My Regrets Begin and End with Pre-Sequel

Borderlands, Borderlands 2, and Borderlands Pre-Sequel.

Apparently major gaming companies can’t count to 3, go figure.

Yes, this is rather late on the Borderlands train because honestly, my friends and I figured that Gearbox would come out with DLCs a little after the game release. And we were right. At least we know what we were getting and if it was going to be worth the splurge (note: it was, guh).

To get right down to it, Pre-Sequel takes place on Pandora’s moon, Elpis and it spans between a rather weird time from a little after Borderlands but not before Borderlands 2, focusing on how Jack became Handsome Jack. So title is rather appropriate. Here, have an intro by the wonderful Sir Hammerlock and Mister Torque.

Gameplay-wise, it’s the same mechanics only with added weapon type, lasers (which Torque really hates because THEY DONT EXPLODE!!) and the lack of gravity, which gives you the ability to slam down on enemies. And a time limit on air. Yeah, breathing is a thing in the game, so you need OZ kits to make sure your eyes don’t pop from your sockets. Thanks for the mental image, Janey.

Also Aurelia is literally the best vault hunter in this entire game I literally cannot. Sure Athena is great and the 0 flirt game she has with Janey is funny as all hell, but Aurelia is beauty and grace and she will b*tchslap your face.

Favorite skin names: Ugh, This Looks Expensive, The Color of Poverty and You Sicken Me.
Favorite second wind quote: "The b*tch is back!"

Plot-wise, I made the mistake of not thinking that this game would give me feelings. I mean I was running on the idea that we’re looking at making of Handsome Jack, king of the douche. And I wasn’t wrong.

But what really got me, like really really really got me, was the character development. 

Now, Handsome Jack is an asshole. 

Rightful holder of the "Biggest Douchebag in the Universe” award. There is literally no other way to explain who he is. This is something you learn in Borderlands 2, and it’s common knowledge. And getting into the game, it’s really difficult to not just shoot Jack repeatedly in the face whenever he talks.

I have wasted so many bullets on that man’s unscarred face.

But this game, you see the slow descent of a man who wanted to do the right thing, of sorts, to the man crazed with the idea that he’s the hero that Pandora deserves. Regardless if they want one or not.

It’s brilliant.

It’s really, really brilliant. It’s that moment where you go “well shit” and proceed to regret all of your life choices up until that point, but dang son. That moment of crazy, where everything just fits together? Fucking. Brilliant.

Also the absolute pain realising that YOU are the REASON THAT CONSTRUCTORS EXIST. THAT ABSOLUTE THING OF DESTRUCTION THAT KILLED ME AND MY FRIENDS IN ULTIMATE VAULT HUNTER MODE REPEATEDLY WAS ALL. OUR. FAULT.

I AM SO SORRY FELICITY

I shit you not, there was a moment where I just sat in the corner of the map, not wanting to move, while my friend went “I told you we should’ve waited. There, there. I’m in pain too"

I mean sure the ending is a bit open-ended for anyone’s liking, and the possibility of Tiny Tina as future Vault Hunter would be all sorts of awesome, but really. So many vaults. So many vault hunters. So little games.